HOW LONG WILL THE MEDIATION TAKE?
It is difficult to give a useful answer as the length of time the process takes will depend on you, your spouse, and the complexity of your situation. Some mediations may be completed within a month but others may go on for over a year.  To a great degree, it is up to you. 

HOW MANY MEETINGS WILL THERE BE?
The simple (trite) answer is as many as it takes.   Meetings are not rationed in number or time. Many cases are resolved in 4-6 meetings, but some cases take longer.

DO YOU SEE US TOGETHER OR SEPARATELY?
Once again, that depends on the two of you.  If your relationship with your spouse is sufficiently amicable that you are happy to be seen together, that is what we will do.  On the other hand, if you prefer to be seen separately, we can do that too – or a combination of joint and separate meetings.  However, even if you are both happy to be seen together, we do like to see you separately at least once so that we can be certain that you have both had the opportunity to speak completely candidly and without fear of upsetting your spouse.

WHAT HAPPENS AT MEDIATION MEETINGS?
It depends on what stage the mediation has reached.  Initially, there is quite a lot of talking so that we can learn about your hopes and fears, what you think would be a fair division of assets or payment of maintenance, what you would be prepared to accept or part with, and so on.  We will also be establishing what the family’s assets and liabilities are and talking about getting supporting documentation.  Having established all that, we will produce a proposal of the division of assets and, over time, we will adjust it and refine it until you both agree that it is as good an arrangement as possible.  We will then prepare the draft documentation and go though it in detail with you to ensure that you understand exactly what you are agreeing.

WHAT DOCUMENTS DO I NEED TO BRING?
For the initial meeting, you don’t need to bring anything, although it is helpful if you can give us an idea of what are the main assets and liabilities of the family.  After that, we will need written evidence of values of most of the items that you own or owe (property, mortgages, bank accounts, investments, credit card balances etc). 

WHAT DOCUMENTATION DO I GET AT THE END OF THE MEDIATION?
If you have not commenced divorce proceedings, initially we will produce a draft Separation Agreement, which is a legal contract that separates your finances and sets out all the terms that have been agreed during the mediation.  We strongly recommend that you take it to your solicitors for approval so that there has been an independent check on what has been achieved.  If any alterations need to be put through, we will do that and, once the Separation Agreement has been signed, it becomes legally binding.  If one of the parties does not abide by the terms of the Separation Agreement, he or she can be taken to Court to have the terms enforced.

If you have commenced divorce proceedings, a Separation Agreement would be inappropriate.  Instead, we produce a Memorandum of Understanding which reflects all that has been agreed but which is not legally binding.  The Memorandum should then be taken to your solicitor, who will convert it into a Consent Order which will go through the Court and become effective when your divorce is finalised (decree absolute).  If the terms of the order are not adhered to, application can be made to the Court to have it enforced.  Only a solicitor can draw up a Consent Order, but we try to make it easy (and thus less expensive) for your solicitor.

DO I HAVE TO GET DIVORCED?
The simple answer is no.  Some people want to part company with their spouses and separate their finances but, for religious or other reasons, do not wish to get divorced.  There is no problem with that, provided both of you are willing to remain married. The Separation Agreement will separate the finances so that you are both financially independent of each other – except to the extent that maintenance is being paid or one has, for example, a financial interest in the house of the other.  However, it may be worth mentioning that if one party wants to get divorced, there is very little the other can do to stop it.

WHAT HAPPENS IF WE CAN’T REACH AGREEMENT
The overwhelming majority of our mediation cases have reached a successful conclusion. However, if it proves impossible to engineer an agreement, the mediation process will come to an end and, if you still wish to separate your finances, you will have to resort to solicitors.  The costs of mediation are unlikely to have been wasted as financial information will have been compiled, and you will have identified the specific points of agreement and disagreement.